"...behaviour that gets labelled schizophrenic is a special strategy that a person invents in order to live in an unlivable situation."
R. D. Laing, The Politics of ExperienceWe admit it: we've been sulking in our tent. We figured that if we couldn't get even 200 subscribers to this piece-of-trash newsletter then screw it, you know? And in fact the last issue precipitated a record number of unsubscribe responses. (OK, so it was only three, but it's already a pretty small list.) Evidently, Free Speech is something one simply does not joke about in this medium. Even if it is just parody. Parody is an advanced concept to some. It's not their fault they don't know what's going on.
On the other hand, it's not our fault either. We did get rid of some of the dead wood that way, even if our numbers went negative there for a minute. But then we noticed that something quite odd was happening. The longer we sulked, the more subscriptions came in. Could we be Onto Something here? A new kind of cyber-extortion, perhaps? Suspecting that this could well be the case, we make this promise to you, Valued Reader: the more subs you send this way, the less we will write. Anyway, we're checking out the hypothesis. If you never get another issue, it means it's working.
Of course, it's entirely possible that this whole sulking business is simply a deep-denial subterfuge attempting to mask the fact that, after just a handful of issues, we are already completely tapped out. Scraping the bottom of the cranial barrel so to speak. However, being committed to the most radical form of honesty (sometimes referred to as shameless exhibitionism), we decided to explore this very possibility in some detail. This has required a sort of split-brain preparation in which we interview Our Virtuous Twin, one clocke. Let's see if we can't get this individual to go on record...
What's So Funny?EGR: So, uh, what do you think about the state of the Internet Industry these days?
clocke: The internet industry?! Have you lost your freaking mind? The "internet industry" can kiss my ass, and so can you! I don't feel like talking. I had a fight with your wife last night and I'm not feeling real chatty. Go away.